Keep Shinning Regardless – An Inspirational Message


be inspred

Have you ever shared your dream with someone only to be discouraged?

Have you ever been so certain about the direction that you want to take only to be told by someone you trust that you are going to fail?

If you answered yes, to any of the above questions then you understand how it feels when someone tries to blow out your light….damn your enthusiasm.

Apparently, it’s human nature for one to damn someone else’s light if theirs isn’t shinning. Remember that misery loves company, and if you are in company with people who have given up on their dreams, don’t expect them to inspire you.

Note that people who feel insecure about their own qualities will attempt to make others feel that way. They will devise mental plots to get you to start doubting yourself.

Furthermore, if one is stuck in a dark place for a while, understand that they have become accustomed to the darkness. They don’t want to experience anything different. Their brains have settled, and it normally takes some mental and emotional work for them to snap out of their illusion and start shinning their own light. Therefore, if you share your dream with someone in that mental state, be sure to receive discouragement.

“If one is stuck in a dark place for a while, understand that they have become accustomed to the darkness”

The next question is, what do you do if someone discourages you?

The answer lies in the very reason why you want to pursue your goal. Your why, should matter more than what anyone else says about you or your goals. Besides, what others think or say about you is their business: that’s their model of the world. Whatever one is projecting in their mind has nothing to do with you. Your business is what’s brewing in your own mind. Therefore, you can’t let naysayers retard your decision to move forward with your dream. Remember, no one but you has the power to put out your light. You are the master of your enthusiasm and your inner thrill, and it’s really up to you to keep shinning no matter what.

“No one but you has the power to put out your light.”

Serena Williams

In this video, I share a few tips that you can use to keep your light shinning. The tips are simple and I’m certain that you already know about them. However, sometimes it helps when we are reminded that the answers and solutions we seek for are always within us.

 

 

 

 

Love and light

http://www.tapthegood.com

Check out the inspirational books below that will help you to ignite your passion to live at the utmost potential, which already dwells within you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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5 Steps to Get Out of a Financial Dilemma


debt

Have you ever found yourself with no money and no idea about what you are going to do to get back up?

Let’s also imagine that you have bills piling and waiting for you to pay.

Let’s further imagine that you lost your job or your business collapsed and you’ve tried everything you can to get a job or business back up and nothing seems to work.

What do you do?

Question

Well, I have been there, done that and I know exactly how it feels to be financially handicapped and hopeless. Yet at the end of it all I realized that what was stressing me out was either what I wished things should have been, or shouldn’t have been, and not necessarily what things really were or meant. Since, for every disappointment I have experienced, I soon discover that it was a blessing in disguise. That aside, I have followed the following steps to get me out of the hard times.

Step 1: Tame Your Mind

Dont wake to be perfect

 

The first thing to do is to deal with your mind. You literally cannot stress over your situation because if you do, things will “seem” worse. “Seem,” is singled out because things are what we define them to be. If you are stressed you are definitely going to redefine the situation and add more drama in order to support your new stressing convictions.

I’m sure you know how worrying about things amplifies them. You have to refocus your mind on what you have and what you are grateful for. I know this seems easier said than done, but it is doable. And when you understand the consequences of negative thinking you will tame your mind to focus on what’s good in your life. I’m certain that you have some good things that you can focus on.

Step 2: Determine what you want and focus on it religiously.

Choices

Many times we might think that we are focusing on what we want when we are actually dwelling on whatever we don’t want. Therefore, you have to take time and examine what you want instead of the financial havoc. Do you want to pay off your bills? How much money do you want? Do you want to be financially free? How does that look like for you? Do you want to get another job or maybe revamp your business? The idea is to be very specific about what you want and then focus on it.

Step 3: Evaluate your resources.

evaluate resources

For this step, you will have to get pen and paper and examine what resources you currently have that are freely available to you. You may have to consider your skills, experiences, education, talents—or anything else that is freely available to you. Another thing to consider is your wardrobe—what you can sell in a yard sale or online. List everything down.

Step 4: Decide on which skill, talent or experience you want to turn into something that will bring in money. For instance, I am also a qualified massage therapist, and during the slow financial times I advertise my massage business because firstly, I already have the required skills plus all the tools required to run a mobile spa. I literally don’t need a lot of money to get started with acquiring clients. I reach out to my regular clients, advertise on free portals like face book, craigslist and Google; and before I know it, I have clients flocking in.  The idea is to choose a skill that won’t cost you money.

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Step 5: Take action. Once you decide on which skill you want to explore, or actions to take, take immediate action. Don’t over think things. Just go for it. Trust that things will work out. Have faith. And even if things don’t work out the first time, keep tweaking them up until they get better. Whatever you do, don’t wait to be perfect.

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Click on this link to access a powerful divine love guided meditation to uplift you – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgMpYijDTjU

Click on this link to access a short inspiration video on never waiting to be perfect. 

In my book, Do Not Force It, Tap The Good, there 3 whole chapters about making something out of nothing. I’m certain that you will benefit from the tips provided.

Tap The Good

To get the book, please click on this link. https://www.amazon.com/Do-not-Force-TAP-GOOD/dp/1461079098/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1534208447&sr=1-2&keywords=Do+Not+Force+It%2C+Tap+The+Good

In the interim, remember that “Loss gives us a chance for an upgrade.” Mpalyenkana

http://www.tapthegood.com

7 Budgeting Mistakes to Avoid


budgeting

Budgeting is crucial to efficient and effective financial management. When we don’t budget, we end up either squandering money or missing out on paying for important and/or time sensitive transactions.

Note that the lack of budgeting is the very reason why the poor remain poor–because they don’t take time to think about what they want and research on how much it will cost.

The question is, how will you know what to spend your money on if you don’t budget? Remember that there is more to living than paying bills. Therefore, take control of your finances and establish budgeting as a mandatory act.

Below are 7 budgeting mistakes to avoid.

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Mistake 1:

When you don’t stick to your savings plan, or when you don’t have a savings plan. In order to achieve financial freedom putting away money as savings to either invest or fall back on in hard times, should be part of the game plan. If you don’t budget for your savings, you are basically rendering yourself vulnerable for financial disaster.

Mistake 2:

When you don’t update your budget plan:

It’s important to update your spending plan so that you are aware of what’s going on periodically. Get a note book, or download an app on your phone (www.everyDollar.com is a good one)) and use these tools to periodically update your budget.

Mistake 3:

When you underestimate or overestimate how much you spend: To avoid this mistake evaluate your previous month’s expenses to use as reference for your spending patterns.

Mistake 4:

When you don’t have a budget: When you don’t have a budget how will you know much to save or what to spend on?

Mistake 5:

When you don’t communicate with your spouse or people in your household about your budget standards: This applies if you have a family. You need to let your spouse know about your budgeting plans so that they spend within its limits.

Mistake 6:

When you only budget once in a while: You have to be consistent with your budget plans. It is an ongoing process, and the good news is that it gets easier with time.

Mistake 7:

Lack of budgeting before your payday: Getting money before you create a spending plan can be dangerous.  Note that by the time you create the plan, half the money will be gone on expenses that can not wait for you to decide whether you need a budget or not.

Note that budgeting is a healthy financial habit that you should embrace. Doing it right will make all the difference, and having a success infused mindset is the starting point.

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Looking to get more organized with your life and finances, check out my book, Do Not Force It, Tap The Good

Tap The Good

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, PHD, MBA is a counselor, transformational coach, corporate trainer, published author and professional speaker. For more about her, please check out http://www.tapthegood.com

6 Reasons Why We Stay in Abusive Relationships


To begin, what are abusive relationships?

Certainly, the answer is relative and depends on the way we individually develop our personal standards. Culture also has a lot to do with what is regarded as abusive and what is not. 

In this article, I share a generalized view of the different and common forms of abuse, and the reasons we stay in abusive relationships.

What are the different forms of abuse?

The list below includes some common forms of abuse although it is not exhaustive of what abuse can be.

  1. Saying Lies About You

When someone says a lie about you, they have abused your persona. They are probably jealous of you or just want to make themselves feel good by putting you down. Another reason why people lie about others is that they want all the attention to be directed at them. For the most part, they are insecure and don’t really feel good about themselves. They believe that by lying about you, others will turn their attention away from their weaknesses and focus on yours.

lying about you

  1. Lying to You

When someone repeatedly lies to you, they firstly do not respect themselves, and the same goes for you or anyone else. Remember, we generally treat others the way we treat ourselves. Most importantly, someone lying to you is a form of abuse. They abuse your intellect by lying.

lying to you

  1. Verbal Insults

This is self-explanatory. When someone insults you by either calling you rude names, making negative comments about your self-image, your intellect, or criticizing the way you do things, they are abusing you. I appreciate that at times someone might say negative things to you because they are going through their own drama and aren’t nice to anyone especially to themselves. But if one insults you more than once they have abusive tendencies. 

verbal abuse

  1. Judgment and criticism

We believe it is normal to judge and/or criticize others. But this is not only wrong but also implies that we are investing our focus on something that doesn’t, and will never promote us. We normally judge others based on what we’ve either been told about them, subconscious bias–if they are different from us, or if they intimidate us. We find a way to judge them–which means making conclusions about them without enough evidence. People are also so accustomed to criticizing others and constantly identifying what they believe is wrong with them. This turns into abuse if one is doing it often and doesn’t change even when you bring it to their attention.

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  1. Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is when someone hits, pushes or engages in any forceful physical activity that causes you discomfort or bodily pain. Note that one time is more than enough times for you to walk away—and trust me on this one.

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Why do we Stay in Abusive Relationships?

In this video, I share 6 reasons that I believe you will relate to. I also share a simple yet powerful tip that will help you get out of any abusive relationship.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/DbV-AcxtN5k

What next?

  1. Firstly, thanks for visiting my blog. Please follow me so that you get periodical blogs on personal development and inspiration.
  2. When you click on the referenced video, please subscribe to my YouTube channel, share and like the video. If you have comments, even better. Please include them in the comments section below.

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If you are in need of a transformational coach and counselor, please contact me at tapthegood@gmail.com

Looking for a powerful life-changing self-help book to read? I got you. Click on this link to order your copy.

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Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA, is a published author, transformational coach, counselor and professional speaker. For more about her, please visit her website at http://www.tapthgood.com.

10 Things To Do When You Feel Frustrated With Life


Frustrate

Although there are many reasons that incite our frustrations, the main reasons are founded on two major factors: money and relationships.

We get frustrated because we either don’t have money, we are losing money or money is not coming in as expected. We also get frustrated because of the people we deal with: especially because we are all different and view the world from a diverse perspective.

One thing I have learned is that the factors that promote our negative emotions, plus the negative emotions are not as crucial in influencing our emotional well-being as our perception about them. As such, my intention is to share 10 tips that you can use to get out of a frustrated mood regardless of the foundation of your frustrations. Remember,  it is not what happens to us that impacts our lives; it’s how we perceive whatever happens.     

  1. Move

By moving, I mean, changing your physicality. Do yoga, dance, go for a walk, exercise: the idea is to get your body moving. Once your body is moving, your brain will change its focus from the frustration to whatever you are doing.

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“The difference between peak performance and poor performance is not intelligence or ability; most often it’s the state that your mind and body is in.” – Tony Robbins

Note that emotion is created by motion. In other words, emotions are linked to movement in our bodies. Observe your posture when you are happy, as opposed to when you are sad — or what you look like when you are angry, versus when you are elated.

  1. Listen To Inspirational Or Upbeat Music.

I understand that sometimes when you are feeling frustrated or sad you don’t have the guts to listen to anything. But if you are so sick and tired of feeling negative you will do whatever it takes to feel better. Some of the songs I listen to when I’m sad include, but are not limited to the following:

  • The Storm is Over – R Kelley

  • A New Day Has Come – Celine Dion

  • Roar – Katy Perry

  • Departed (Right Here) – Brandy

  • I look to You – Whitney Houston

  • I’m Your Angel – Celine Dion and R Kelly

  • When You Believe – Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey

  • Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You) – Kelly Clarkson

  • One Step at a Time – Jordan Sparks

Note that it is important to spend time making your own list.

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         3. Clean

Cleaning your space has a magical way of making you feel better. As you clean, your mind goes into the cleaning mood.  As such, you implicitly clean the frustration from your mind.

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  1. Imagine receiving $1 Million in your bank account; make a list of how you would spend it.

Imagine

  1. Cook

Just go into your kitchen and concoct recipes regardless of what you are cooking. The process will definitely help you divert your mind from the frustration.

Cook

  1. Change your furniture around. Don’t try to be perfect. Just change things around in whichever way you want.

    Change furniture

  1. Go window shopping 

    Window-Shopping

  1. Meditate.       

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  1. Volunteer

This will help you realize how blessed you are.

    Volunteer

  1. Make big plans.

Just make plans without worrying about the resources required to realize them. Make plans as you focus on the things you want to manifest in your life—imagining that there are no obstacles that can hinder you from achieving your goals.

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Conclusion:

Remember that the difference between where you are emotionally or mentally, and where you want to be, is only a decision away. Once you decide to change your mind about anything, you have literally embarked on a profound journey of getting to your desired destination.

Reading self-help books is also another vital tip that will help infuse your mind with self-improvement–which is a good thing. You may want to check out my book: Do Not Force It, Tap The Good – Link – https://www.amazon.com/Do-not-Force-TAP-GOOD/dp/1461079098

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Love and light.

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, PH.D, MBA, is a published author of 5 books, a Transformational coach, Counselor and Professional speaker. For more about her, check out her website at www.tapthegood.com

The Only Competition there is, is with YOU!


Beloved soul,

Know that you are enough, and can never compete with anyone. You are unique, and there’s only one you with your blue print. So, focus on making yourself the best you. Don’t try to compete with anyone. Compete with yourself. Be better today than you were yesterday. Even when you are in a competitive setting, focus on expressing yourself the best way you can. The rest will work out itself.

In this VIDEO, I share an empowerment message with the preceding content as the theme.

Link to the video – https://youtu.be/Y0Mjku0GUb4

Love and light

Remember, March 1st, is Global Worry-Free Day.

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YOU CAN NEVER BE REJECTED – A POWERFUL SELF-EMPOWERMENT MESSAGE


rejection

  • Have you ever felt rejected?

  • How do you know that you were rejected? 

  • Do you believe that you can change the terms you use to explain your experiences in order to perceive them in a healthier way?

  • Do you know that you can never be, will never be, and have never been rejected? 

  • Check out this video for my take on the subject.  Link to video – https://youtu.be/og_H0imtwOg

    For our upcoming events, please click on this link

Link to our February 2018 event – https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-mind-spirit-rebirth-and-rejuvenation-seasonal-seminar-tickets-40745783736

Jacent Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA is a counselor, transformation coach, trainer, published author and professional speaker. Check out her website at http://www.tapthegood.com, for more about her.