Is Your Job Progressing, or Retarding You?


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In school, for the most part we are programmed to believe that the only way to make it in life is to work for others. And although there’s nothing wrong with being employed, the danger is when we either don’t earn what we deserve or don’t ask for what we deserve because we don’t feel worthy.

In this short video, I share a few insights to inspire you to recognize your worth and then act accordingly.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/Ok7e06h7J5s

Please remember to subscribe to our YouTube channel. Leave comments if you felt inspired or have questions

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For all your counseling and transformational coaching needs check out, http://www.tapthegood.com/counseling/

6 Reasons Why We Stay in Abusive Relationships


To begin, what are abusive relationships?

Certainly, the answer is relative and depends on the way we individually develop our personal standards. Culture also has a lot to do with what is regarded as abusive and what is not. 

In this article, I share a generalized view of the different and common forms of abuse, and the reasons we stay in abusive relationships.

What are the different forms of abuse?

The list below includes some common forms of abuse although it is not exhaustive of what abuse can be.

  1. Saying Lies About You

When someone says a lie about you, they have abused your persona. They are probably jealous of you or just want to make themselves feel good by putting you down. Another reason why people lie about others is that they want all the attention to be directed at them. For the most part, they are insecure and don’t really feel good about themselves. They believe that by lying about you, others will turn their attention away from their weaknesses and focus on yours.

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  1. Lying to You

When someone repeatedly lies to you, they firstly do not respect themselves, and the same goes for you or anyone else. Remember, we generally treat others the way we treat ourselves. Most importantly, someone lying to you is a form of abuse. They abuse your intellect by lying.

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  1. Verbal Insults

This is self-explanatory. When someone insults you by either calling you rude names, making negative comments about your self-image, your intellect, or criticizing the way you do things, they are abusing you. I appreciate that at times someone might say negative things to you because they are going through their own drama and aren’t nice to anyone especially to themselves. But if one insults you more than once they have abusive tendencies. 

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  1. Judgment and criticism

We believe it is normal to judge and/or criticize others. But this is not only wrong but also implies that we are investing our focus on something that doesn’t, and will never promote us. We normally judge others based on what we’ve either been told about them, subconscious bias–if they are different from us, or if they intimidate us. We find a way to judge them–which means making conclusions about them without enough evidence. People are also so accustomed to criticizing others and constantly identifying what they believe is wrong with them. This turns into abuse if one is doing it often and doesn’t change even when you bring it to their attention.

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  1. Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is when someone hits, pushes or engages in any forceful physical activity that causes you discomfort or bodily pain. Note that one time is more than enough times for you to walk away—and trust me on this one.

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Why do we Stay in Abusive Relationships?

In this video, I share 6 reasons that I believe you will relate to. I also share a simple yet powerful tip that will help you get out of any abusive relationship.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/DbV-AcxtN5k

What next?

  1. Firstly, thanks for visiting my blog. Please follow me so that you get periodical blogs on personal development and inspiration.
  2. When you click on the referenced video, please subscribe to my YouTube channel, share and like the video. If you have comments, even better. Please include them in the comments section below.

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If you are in need of a transformational coach and counselor, please contact me at tapthegood@gmail.com

Looking for a powerful life-changing self-help book to read? I got you. Click on this link to order your copy.

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Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA, is a published author, transformational coach, counselor and professional speaker. For more about her, please visit her website at http://www.tapthgood.com.

YOU CAN NEVER BE REJECTED – A POWERFUL SELF-EMPOWERMENT MESSAGE


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  • Have you ever felt rejected?

  • How do you know that you were rejected? 

  • Do you believe that you can change the terms you use to explain your experiences in order to perceive them in a healthier way?

  • Do you know that you can never be, will never be, and have never been rejected? 

  • Check out this video for my take on the subject.  Link to video – https://youtu.be/og_H0imtwOg

    For our upcoming events, please click on this link

Link to our February 2018 event – https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-mind-spirit-rebirth-and-rejuvenation-seasonal-seminar-tickets-40745783736

Jacent Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA is a counselor, transformation coach, trainer, published author and professional speaker. Check out her website at http://www.tapthegood.com, for more about her.

 

 

The Poison of the Mind & How to banish It.


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> What do you think is the most powerful poison of your mind

> What do you think gets in the way of you taking action

> Well, it’s yours to find out my views on the same in this video

Link to the video – https://youtu.be/Nn9VXrz0zvk

In the interim, I wish you and your family a glamorous holiday season filled with wonders, love and miracles. 

Don’t forget to sign up for my upcoming seminar scheduled for February 10th, 2018, a full day event intended to help you get in touch with your inner world in order to be the master of your outer world. 

Link to the event – https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-mind-spirit-rebirth-and-rejuvenation-seasonal-seminar-tickets-40745783736

Remember: “It is only when we take control of, and master the whole of inner worlds that we can change our outer worlds for the better.”

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Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA

Author, Spiritual Counselor, Coach, Trainer, Speaker

http://www.tapthegood.com

It is Time to Surrender – 3 Proven Psychological Steps to Help you Surrender


Are you attached to a desire or goal and finding it hard to surrender to the process?

Does your passion/desire for your goal stress you out?

Are you worried that you might not achieve your goal?

Well, maybe it is time to surrender. And to do so, I have recorded this VIDEO with 3 proven psychological tools to help you detach from your goal, and instead focus on the goals as you also enjoy every moment of the process.

I know this will help.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/F2qpkBwEtqs

Please do not forget to share with friends or family who might need these tips.

Love and light.

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, PH.D., MBA

Author, Spiritual Counselor, Corporate Trainer, Speaker

http://www.tapthegood.com

 

 

Feeling Stressed Out? Three Tips to Inspire You


I recently went through an experience that left me feeling beaten and broken. I felt as if I was behind a curtain. I felt as if my true intentions weren’t understood. I felt betrayed, weak and discouraged. I felt misjudged, isolated and rejected.

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Now, you will agree that such feelings can leave one in a state of emotional warfare. Yet I knew that I had to get up. I knew that I couldn’t control anyone else but myself. I had to take my power back, and determine the way I wanted to feel regardless of what anyone else thought or felt about me. I had to continue following my dreams, and focusing on my goals. I had to feel good again which is the only way that would enable me to wake up and try at this thing called life. I needed inspiration to keep going .

In this video, I share three tips that I employed to feel inspired. I hope they help you feel inspired. Please share the video with anyone you know needs some inspiration today.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/c1PxuWSjDpg

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Have a good week.

Love and light

http://www.tapthegood.com

 

 

Four Tips to Deal with Rejection: Part 2:


In part 1 of this article, “How to Deal with Rejection – based on a personal story”, I shared a personal story about one of my childhood experiences of rejection. I’m certain that you or someone you know has gone through similar or maybe even worse experiences.

In this article, I share 4 tips that helped me deal with rejection and build a healthier self-esteem. And although I appreciate the fact that your experiences or those of your loved ones might be different, I’m also certain that anyone will be able to customize these tips and make them their own in order to resolve any rejection related emotional issues that they might be experiencing.

Tip 1: Know That no one can Reject You.

As weird as it might sound, believe me when I say that no one can actually reject you. One of the meanings of rejection is to be eliminated. And in my opinion, no one can eliminate you per-say. One might eliminate your presence from a scene, or disregard what you say, but he/she can never eliminate your existence. Chances are that what you perceive as rejection is an incident where someone probably did not resonate with, understand, or agree with whatever you were presenting or offering. However, with all due respect, this doesn’t mean that the entire awesome you was discarded.

Therefore, the first tip you can employ to deal with rejection-related emotions is to change your perception of the word, rejection and how it applies to you as an individual.

No one can reject you

Tip 2: Know that People’s Actions are Their Business.

As you deal with the rejection-related emotions, understand that perception is projection. Behavior is founded on internal representations: meaning that people behave as they have learned to, based on their beliefs and thought processes, mental, emotional and spiritual states. Everyone is doing the best they can with the internal resources they have. I’m sure you’ve heard the statement, “squeeze an orange and you get orange juice.” When someone is filled with anger, sadness or whatever other emotions that they might have, that’s exactly what’s going to come out of them as they perceive the world, as well as act. Therefore, if someone rejects something about you, this has nothing to do with you. It is their business. That’s how they know how to operate. Note that at that point in time, your presence or whatever they rejected triggered a decision within them to reject. Consequently, you can’t take things personally. And most importantly, you have to forgive them for their actions because they probably didn’t even realize that there was anything wrong with the way they acted. Just as you can’t expect mango juice to come out of an orange, you can’t expect a person filled with rudeness or anger to treat you with kindness or non-judgment.

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Tip 3: Take 100% Responsibility Of Your Emotions:

When we take full responsibility of our negative emotions, we take our power back from whoever we have blamed for the way we feel. By taking full responsibility for the rejection-related negative emotions, we get to understand that no one has the power to make us feel a certain way; and that we have the power to heal ourselves. This process begins by identifying all those negative emotions that you are feeling. Write them down. Examine each one of them to identify the root causes. Establish if the root causes are really based on truths. For instance, if one of the negative related emotions you are dealing with is sadness, the root cause is what the person said or did, that made you believe that you are a reject. When you examine tip 1, you realize that you are not really a reject. Tip 2, is telling you that whatever the person did is not your business. Consequently, your perceptions are not founded on the truth. You are not a reject. Therefore, you just have to let the sadness go because it is built on lies.

The next step is to forgive yourself for being sad for the wrong reasons. Here’s a link (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGUjtMRS_5k) with a forgiveness process that I recorded a few years ago. To access the link, please copy and paste the link in a new browser, then click “enter.”

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Tip 4: Know That You Can Create a New And Better Story About Your Self-Image

The thoughts and related beliefs about being rejection are founded on a story you created based on an experience that you believed to be the truth. Note that just as you created this story, you also have the power to erase it and then create a new and better story about how you want to feel about yourself. You can do this by thinking about how you want to perceive your self-image. Decide how you want to be perceived. Write these attributes down. Read them to yourself every day until you believe them as the truth. For instance, you can write statements such; I accept and love myself just as I am. I am worthy. I deserve to be treated with respect. I respect myself—you get the idea. The fundamental thing to do is to think and believe these statements as the truth. And by doing this, you will be writing a better story that will improve your perception of yourself.
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Please note that although these tips are simplified, they helped me deal with my rejection-related negative emotions and I believe they can help you or anyone else. The idea is to make the tips your own, do the work on yourself, and remember that persistence and repetition are necessary ingredients required to establish and reinforce desired change.

The author is Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA. She’s an author, speaker, counselor and transformational coach. For more about her, please check out her website at www.tapthegood.com

Looking for a good inspirational book to empower and inspire you? Look no further. Click HERE to read THE book. 

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EFT Session to Get Unstuck From an Abusive Relationship


Do you feel stuck in a relationship that makes you feel like buying a big rope and tying it around your neck?

In this EFT RECORDED SESSION, I take you through a process to release your grip on any abusive relationship you may be involved in–whether it’s a job, friendship or love.

LINK to video – https://youtu.be/_zlrg7jBNh8

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If there are any issues that you would like me to deal with using EFT, psychology or Hooponopono, please include the details in the comments.

Thank you for visiting my blog.

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Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA

http://www.tapthegood.com