How to Communicate Without Creating Conflict:


ConflictTo communicate to others about our concerns without creating conflict requires skill. To begin, sometimes the pressing concerns might be perceptions of how someone or others might have offended us. We might base the concerns on one’s reckless behavior; one who probably didn’t pay attention to what they were saying. However, we have to remember that at some point we also offended others unintentionally. 

Note that we base our communication style on who we are, our thought patterns, and emotional states. A happy person will communicate in happy terms. An angry or sad person will communicate in a way that reflects those states. So, sometimes someone might communicate rudely because they are dealing with inner discomforts. When we point out what they did and how wrong they were, we create scenarios that can inspire them to fight back. They perceive us as enemies because we’ve triggered their “fight” sense. We have focused on what we believe is wrong about them: which creates more of the same behavior—considering that energy flows where the focus is. We are also focusing on them, and not on ourselves. We are resisting their behavior, which creates more of it. It is like opening a tin of worms. 

The question then is, how can we communicate our concerns without creating conflict? 

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Let’s imagine that your boss screamed at you for something you didn’t do. To address your concerns, you say: “You screamed at me for something I didn’t do, and that makes you a very rude person.” When we evaluate the meaning of this statement, it’s clear you are apportioning blame, you have made conclusions about their character, and you have told them what you don’t want. Let’s imagine that you are the boss, how would those statements make you feel? How would you react or respond to your employee? Although you might concur that you were wrong, the way he/she communicated could trigger feelings of anger or defensiveness within you. Note that a relationship based on blame crumbles more often than not. 

How Can we Improve?

Instead of, “You screamed at me for something I didn’t do, and that makes you a very rude person.” Consider, “When you screamed at me, I felt uneasy. I request that you tell me what you want or mean.” With the preceding statement, you haven’t made conclusions about their character, you haven’t blamed them, and you are making a request—which makes them feel important. You are also telling them what you want—which directs their attention from themselves to you. 

When we communicate in terms of what we want, we help others understand what we want. We also avoid arguments. The idea is to be persistent in communicating in those terms. Because some people won’t get it immediately. They might be so accustomed to communicating in terms of what they don’t want and will not relate to your communication style. However, the more you stick to your positive communication trends, the sooner they will learn or at least mirror you. 

In my book, Communicating Your Way to Success: Master the Art of Persuasion and Become the Authority of Your Craft, I share simple, proven tools of how to influence others to do what you want without taking away from what they want. 

http://www.tapthegood.com

3 Psychological techniques to Achieve Consistent Business Success


Are you a business owner?

business-owner

Do you find yourself struggling with making progress for yourself, and/or business?

struggling-business-owner

The problem might be that you are not considering the most important asset of your business; YOU.

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Many business people focus so much on the techniques and strategies to run their businesses but ignore the most important asset…themselves. Jim Rohn indicated that success for any project is based on 80% psychology, and 20% technique. Psychology is about how our minds work.

Have you ever found yourself having all the resources you need such as time, money, and other assets to get started on a project yet for some reason fail to start? That has everything to do with your psychology: how your mind works, why, when and how you make decisions—among other things.

Below are three tips to consider in order to include yourself in your business, and I mean inclusion of the self–to emphasize.

1. Examine your thought process. What do you think about yourself? What do you think about your business? Why are you pursuing that business in the first place? If you were on sale in a market place, would you buy yourself?

thought-process

2. Examine how, when and why you make decisions. What inspires you to make decision?

thinking-process

3. Identify your fears. Take some time to contemplate on your fears. What are you afraid of? Why are you afraid? Do you have evidence to support your fears? What are you basing your fears on? For instance, if you are afraid that your business might not succeed, what are you basing this fear on? What happened in the past that has got you to this mental state? Are you taking action? If not why?

fears

If you take time to contemplate on the preceding issues, I guarantee that you will discover a few things about yourself that you might want to change or upgrade.

I also recommend that you get my book, Communicating Your Way to Success; Master the Art of Persuasion, Increase Sales, and Stand Out from the Crowd. The book shares an entire detailed interactive chapter about selling yourself to you. In this chapter, the above tips are elaborated on, and more.

Interested in personalized personal/business coaching? Visit my website at http://www.tapthegood.com and sign up for a complimentary 15 mins’ discovery session.

Remember, nothing happens if nothing moves. Take the step to consider yourself as an important asset to you, your family and business which is when consistent success will become inevitable.

Love and light

http://www.tapthegood.com

A POWERFUL Mind Trigger Tool to Turn Leads into Customers


In this video, I share a POWERFUL yet proven mind trigger tool that can help one turn more leads into customers.

Video URL – https://youtu.be/mGZuOQ-Im8Y

For more explanations and examples of mind triggers, check out my book –  Communicating Your Way to Success: Master the Art of Persuasion, Positively Influence Others, Increase Sales, and Stand Out From the Crowd.

Link to books:
Kindle – discounted to $0.99 for a limited time only –
http://www.amazon.com/Communicating-Your-
Way-Success-Persuasion-ebook/dp/B0151Y8CCM/

Paperback link –
http://www.amazon.com/Communicating-Your-
Way-Success-Persuasion/dp/1515179087/

http://www.tapthegood.com/books/

Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana

http://www.tapthegood.com

The Most Important Step to Master and Benefit from the Art of Persuasion


To learn about the most important step to master and benefit from the art of persuasion, click the link below to access the video.

 

 

To learn more about my full day – Art of Persuasion Seminar Scheduled for February 6th, 2016, click on this link. http://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-art-of-persuasion-101-tickets-19585873876

Love and light

Tapthegood.com/training

How to Handle Sales Rebuttals – Step 2


In this video (Link to video – https://youtu.be/W3pNoozY3tM), I share the second tip on How to Handle Sales Rebuttals. 

If this information has captured your interest, check out the book – Communicating Your Way to Success: Master the Art of Persuasion, Positively Influence Others, Increase Sales, and Stand Out from the Crowd.

Native Proof_5632292_Front Cover

Love and Light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA

http://www.tapthegood.com

How To Handle Customer Rebuttals


In this video, I share a few vital tips on how to handle customer rebuttals.

Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA

Author, Speaker & Success Coach

http://www.tapthegood.com

Ahttps://youtu.be/C0-pwku66cQ

Author of: Communicating Your Way to Success: Master the Art of Persuasion, Positively Influence Others, Increase Sales, and Stand Out From the Crowd.

Native Proof_5632292_Front Cover

The Most Important Step for Business Owners in The Process of Becoming Persuasive


In this video, I share the most important step that business owners need to embrace to become more persuasive.

Here’s the link to the video – https://youtu.be/ZCLG4RnpVe4

If this caught your attention, and I believe it did, take advantage and pre-order the book – Communicating Your Way to Success, between now and 9/25.

The kindle pre-order price, is a sweet price of $0.99

Link – http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0151Y8CCM)

The paperback is $9.75 (half the price) – Link – http://tapthegood.com/books/

Amazon link – http://www.amazon.com/Communicating-Your-Way-Success-Persuasion/dp/1515179087

Native Proof_5632292_Front Cover

Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D. MBA

Author, Speaker, Counselor / Success Coach

http://www.tapthegood.com

author@tapthegood.com

I need Your Support


Dear friends,

Native Proof_5632292_Front Cover
The book is now available to pre-order on kindle at ONLY $0.99, paperback – $9.75 – 50% off the price. 

Please, pre-order the book either in kindle or paperback to help me become a best seller. 
 
Thank you so much in advance. I appreciate you.
 
Have a gracious day. 
 
Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D. MBA
Author, Speaker, Counselor & Success Coach
tapthegood.com
author@tapthegood.com
Ph: 818-862-1182

The Most Vital Ingredient to Build a Personal Platform for Business Persuasion


This week, I’ve decided to record a brief audio in place of writing an article so that you can listen to it as many times as you want.

Link to audio – https://soundcloud.com/jacinta-mpalyenkana/the-most-important-ingredient-for-business-persuasion

For more details, please check out my website at http://www.tapthegood.com

Claim your 30 minutes complimentary session at http://www.tapthegood.com 🙂

Remember, you are reading this content with the mind of the person responsible for his or her success 🙂

Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA

Author, Professional Speaker, Success Coach/ Mentor

author@tapthegood.com

http://www.tapthegood.com

How Powerful Are Your Words?


Joel Osteen once stated, “You can change your world by changing your words. Remember, life and death, are in the power of words.”

The power of words

Print and electronic communication emphasizes the former statement due to the fact that, in the communication process, words are written and presented for future reference. This presents a lot of evidence that could destroy or liberate not only business owners but also the world in general. Documents written centuries ago have been a point of reference for major disputes and wars in the world today. On the other hand, printed material in form of books has been used to educate, inspire and change mindsets of the world. This very fact presents a threat, rather than something to celebrate, on the possible dangers that print and/or electronic communications can create. Considering that spoken and unrecorded words or conversations can be easily forgotten, printed material, if not discarded, can exist as long as time itself.

words-hurt

It’s hence vital for business owners to pay close attention to their non-personal communication structures in order to avoid possible dangers and, most importantly, transfer their messages and achieve their objectives.

captivating speaker

Carol Burnett, an American actress, comedian, and singer, once stated that: “Words once printed, have a life of their own.” Today the number of businesses that lose millions of dollars due to bad communication structures is limitless.

wordshavepower

Question:

Do you have a structured sales pitch that you can tweak to match your target audiences? I’m talking about that message that introduces you to your audience and elicits interest in them for you, and your business in just a few words. Regardless of your answer to the preceding question, I encourage you to take advantage of my 30 minutes’ complimentary session where I will help you design a captivating sales pitch or evaluate the one you have–if you do. 

Love and Light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D. MBA

Author, Speaker, Counselor, Success Coach

http://tapthegood.com

author@tapthegood.com