6 Reasons Why We Stay in Abusive Relationships


To begin, what are abusive relationships?

Certainly, the answer is relative and depends on the way we individually develop our personal standards. Culture also has a lot to do with what is regarded as abusive and what is not. 

In this article, I share a generalized view of the different and common forms of abuse, and the reasons we stay in abusive relationships.

What are the different forms of abuse?

The list below includes some common forms of abuse although it is not exhaustive of what abuse can be.

  1. Saying Lies About You

When someone says a lie about you, they have abused your persona. They are probably jealous of you or just want to make themselves feel good by putting you down. Another reason why people lie about others is that they want all the attention to be directed at them. For the most part, they are insecure and don’t really feel good about themselves. They believe that by lying about you, others will turn their attention away from their weaknesses and focus on yours.

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  1. Lying to You

When someone repeatedly lies to you, they firstly do not respect themselves, and the same goes for you or anyone else. Remember, we generally treat others the way we treat ourselves. Most importantly, someone lying to you is a form of abuse. They abuse your intellect by lying.

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  1. Verbal Insults

This is self-explanatory. When someone insults you by either calling you rude names, making negative comments about your self-image, your intellect, or criticizing the way you do things, they are abusing you. I appreciate that at times someone might say negative things to you because they are going through their own drama and aren’t nice to anyone especially to themselves. But if one insults you more than once they have abusive tendencies. 

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  1. Judgment and criticism

We believe it is normal to judge and/or criticize others. But this is not only wrong but also implies that we are investing our focus on something that doesn’t, and will never promote us. We normally judge others based on what we’ve either been told about them, subconscious bias–if they are different from us, or if they intimidate us. We find a way to judge them–which means making conclusions about them without enough evidence. People are also so accustomed to criticizing others and constantly identifying what they believe is wrong with them. This turns into abuse if one is doing it often and doesn’t change even when you bring it to their attention.

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  1. Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is when someone hits, pushes or engages in any forceful physical activity that causes you discomfort or bodily pain. Note that one time is more than enough times for you to walk away—and trust me on this one.

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Why do we Stay in Abusive Relationships?

In this video, I share 6 reasons that I believe you will relate to. I also share a simple yet powerful tip that will help you get out of any abusive relationship.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/DbV-AcxtN5k

What next?

  1. Firstly, thanks for visiting my blog. Please follow me so that you get periodical blogs on personal development and inspiration.
  2. When you click on the referenced video, please subscribe to my YouTube channel, share and like the video. If you have comments, even better. Please include them in the comments section below.

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If you are in need of a transformational coach and counselor, please contact me at tapthegood@gmail.com

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Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA, is a published author, transformational coach, counselor and professional speaker. For more about her, please visit her website at http://www.tapthgood.com.

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3 Psychological techniques to Achieve Consistent Business Success


Are you a business owner?

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Do you find yourself struggling with making progress for yourself, and/or business?

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The problem might be that you are not considering the most important asset of your business; YOU.

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Many business people focus so much on the techniques and strategies to run their businesses but ignore the most important asset…themselves. Jim Rohn indicated that success for any project is based on 80% psychology, and 20% technique. Psychology is about how our minds work.

Have you ever found yourself having all the resources you need such as time, money, and other assets to get started on a project yet for some reason fail to start? That has everything to do with your psychology: how your mind works, why, when and how you make decisions—among other things.

Below are three tips to consider in order to include yourself in your business, and I mean inclusion of the self–to emphasize.

1. Examine your thought process. What do you think about yourself? What do you think about your business? Why are you pursuing that business in the first place? If you were on sale in a market place, would you buy yourself?

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2. Examine how, when and why you make decisions. What inspires you to make decision?

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3. Identify your fears. Take some time to contemplate on your fears. What are you afraid of? Why are you afraid? Do you have evidence to support your fears? What are you basing your fears on? For instance, if you are afraid that your business might not succeed, what are you basing this fear on? What happened in the past that has got you to this mental state? Are you taking action? If not why?

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If you take time to contemplate on the preceding issues, I guarantee that you will discover a few things about yourself that you might want to change or upgrade.

I also recommend that you get my book, Communicating Your Way to Success; Master the Art of Persuasion, Increase Sales, and Stand Out from the Crowd. The book shares an entire detailed interactive chapter about selling yourself to you. In this chapter, the above tips are elaborated on, and more.

Interested in personalized personal/business coaching? Visit my website at http://www.tapthegood.com and sign up for a complimentary 15 mins’ discovery session.

Remember, nothing happens if nothing moves. Take the step to consider yourself as an important asset to you, your family and business which is when consistent success will become inevitable.

Love and light

http://www.tapthegood.com