6 Reasons Why We Stay in Abusive Relationships


To begin, what are abusive relationships?

Certainly, the answer is relative and depends on the way we individually develop our personal standards. Culture also has a lot to do with what is regarded as abusive and what is not. 

In this article, I share a generalized view of the different and common forms of abuse, and the reasons we stay in abusive relationships.

What are the different forms of abuse?

The list below includes some common forms of abuse although it is not exhaustive of what abuse can be.

  1. Saying Lies About You

When someone says a lie about you, they have abused your persona. They are probably jealous of you or just want to make themselves feel good by putting you down. Another reason why people lie about others is that they want all the attention to be directed at them. For the most part, they are insecure and don’t really feel good about themselves. They believe that by lying about you, others will turn their attention away from their weaknesses and focus on yours.

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  1. Lying to You

When someone repeatedly lies to you, they firstly do not respect themselves, and the same goes for you or anyone else. Remember, we generally treat others the way we treat ourselves. Most importantly, someone lying to you is a form of abuse. They abuse your intellect by lying.

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  1. Verbal Insults

This is self-explanatory. When someone insults you by either calling you rude names, making negative comments about your self-image, your intellect, or criticizing the way you do things, they are abusing you. I appreciate that at times someone might say negative things to you because they are going through their own drama and aren’t nice to anyone especially to themselves. But if one insults you more than once they have abusive tendencies. 

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  1. Judgment and criticism

We believe it is normal to judge and/or criticize others. But this is not only wrong but also implies that we are investing our focus on something that doesn’t, and will never promote us. We normally judge others based on what we’ve either been told about them, subconscious bias–if they are different from us, or if they intimidate us. We find a way to judge them–which means making conclusions about them without enough evidence. People are also so accustomed to criticizing others and constantly identifying what they believe is wrong with them. This turns into abuse if one is doing it often and doesn’t change even when you bring it to their attention.

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  1. Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is when someone hits, pushes or engages in any forceful physical activity that causes you discomfort or bodily pain. Note that one time is more than enough times for you to walk away—and trust me on this one.

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Why do we Stay in Abusive Relationships?

In this video, I share 6 reasons that I believe you will relate to. I also share a simple yet powerful tip that will help you get out of any abusive relationship.

Link to video – https://youtu.be/DbV-AcxtN5k

What next?

  1. Firstly, thanks for visiting my blog. Please follow me so that you get periodical blogs on personal development and inspiration.
  2. When you click on the referenced video, please subscribe to my YouTube channel, share and like the video. If you have comments, even better. Please include them in the comments section below.

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If you are in need of a transformational coach and counselor, please contact me at tapthegood@gmail.com

Looking for a powerful life-changing self-help book to read? I got you. Click on this link to order your copy.

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Love and light

Dr. Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA, is a published author, transformational coach, counselor and professional speaker. For more about her, please visit her website at http://www.tapthgood.com.

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YOU CAN NEVER BE REJECTED – A POWERFUL SELF-EMPOWERMENT MESSAGE


rejection

  • Have you ever felt rejected?

  • How do you know that you were rejected? 

  • Do you believe that you can change the terms you use to explain your experiences in order to perceive them in a healthier way?

  • Do you know that you can never be, will never be, and have never been rejected? 

  • Check out this video for my take on the subject.  Link to video – https://youtu.be/og_H0imtwOg

    For our upcoming events, please click on this link

Link to our February 2018 event – https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-mind-spirit-rebirth-and-rejuvenation-seasonal-seminar-tickets-40745783736

Jacent Mpalyenkana, Ph.D., MBA is a counselor, transformation coach, trainer, published author and professional speaker. Check out her website at http://www.tapthegood.com, for more about her.

 

 

The Most Powerful Self-Improvement Question


As the year ends, other than spending a lot of money on gifts and preparing for the holiday celebrations, we get prompted to think about what we’ve achieved during the year, what we’ve lost, what we want to achieve the following year, what to change about ourselves, how to change, financial goals, relationships goals…the list goes on.

Many, (and I plead guilty for doing this for a number of years,) have long given up on the annual-goal setting exercise because they either never follow-through with their goals, or simply, for some reason, fail to achieve their goals. So, for the fear of failing again, they negate or ignore annual resolutions.

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However, I have discovered that there is a single question that I have asked myself each year, and have also recommended for my clients, that doesn’t only help to re-establish personal worth, but also leads to new insights about self. Also, this question has somehow led me into evaluating my finance, friendship, business and future related goals.

The question is: “What do I deserve?”

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When you take time to contemplate on, and answer this question, I suggest that you consider thinking about what you are tolerating, let it be partnerships, a job (if you are employed), lifestyle, friendships—to mention but a few. After establishing what you might be tolerating, proceed to analyze what you think you deserve and why. Before you are done, you will have your most important new goals ready for your execution.

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If you discover that you are tolerating more than you think, then contact me at www.tapthegood.com/contacts/ for a complimentary personal coaching/counseling session to establish how I can help you take your power back and become the authority of your life.

Looking for a good book to read during the holidays? Check out, Do not Force it, Tap The Good: How to Tap Into One’s Infinite Potential, Develop a Profound Positive Attitude and Live Life on Your Terms.

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Happy holidays

Love and light

Jacinta Mpalyenkana, Ph.D, MBA

Published Author, Counselor, Personal Coach, Professional Speaker

http://www.tapthegood.com